CURRENTLY AUDITING HOTELS IN SOUTHEAST ASIA

I didn't fly 14 hours to

charge my laptop in the bathroom.

35 checkpoints of zero tolerance.
Not for luxury theater. For basic competence.

35
Checkpoints
9
Phases
70
Points Possible
See the Reviews ↓ How It Works →
The Process
How every audit happens.
Four steps. No shortcuts.
Step 01
🎙️

I check in. I capture everything.

Every impression, live, from the moment I walk through the door. Every friction point, every missing item — documented in real time.

Step 02
📋

35 things. Scored 0–2.

Each checkpoint is rated: 0 = friction (it's broken or absent), 1 = functional (it works, barely), 2 = invisible (I never had to think about it).

Step 03
🤖

AI does the paperwork.

Photos, voice recordings, and notes get structured into a formatted audit. The complaints are mine. The formatting is artificial intelligence.

Step 04
📢

You get the truth.

Published with the hotel name, the score, the details, and zero sugar-coating. If the kitchen doesn't have dish soap, you'll know.

The Scoring
What the numbers mean.
Every audit produces a score out of 70. Here's how to read it.
80%+
Chef's Kiss
"This place gets it. I have no notes. I'm suspicious."
60–79%
It'll Do
"Fine. I have notes. I'll probably survive."
40–59%
We Need to Talk
"I'm writing a strongly worded internal monologue."
<40%
Absolutely Not
"I want my money back. And a formal apology. And dish soap."
The Audits
Every place. Scored and published.
See Full Methodology →
🔍

No audits yet.

I'm currently checking in somewhere in Southeast Asia, judging the light switches. The voice recorder is running. The rubric is loaded. The dish soap is being inventoried.

First review dropping soon.
📣
Join the Network
Become a Karen.

Got strong opinions and zero tolerance for foolishness? We're building a network of auditors who use the same rubric, the same scoring system, and the same beautiful lack of chill. If you've ever silently judged a hotel room before your bags hit the floor, you might be one of us.

Apply to be a Karen →
Unserious ones also welcome.
About
Meet Karen.

I'm a digital nomad. I work remotely and move between serviced apartments across Southeast Asia — usually in the $150–300/night range. Not hostels. Not five-star resorts. The messy middle where you're paying real money and expecting real competence.

Most places treat you like their unpaid quality control manager. Something's broken? They expect you to find it, report it, wait for the fix — and somehow be fine with the cortisol. I don't want to manage your hotel for you. I just want to show up, sit down, and get to work.

So I audit every place I stay. 35 checkpoints. 9 phases. Everything that should just work but somehow never does. The scores get published. The names get named.

Built by one dude. More Karens coming.

"Complaining is a skill. I just turned mine into a methodology."
The Stays

$150–300/night serviced apartments. The kind with kitchens that should work but somehow never have a can opener.

The Method

35 checkpoints, 9 phases, 0–2 scoring. Voice-recorded on arrival, structured by AI, published with receipts.

The Promise

No comps. No partnerships. No curve. If your hotel scores a 23/70, I'm publishing a 23/70.